Still no word from what's-his-name

[fatrockstar]

I sent an email to Garret a week or so ago regarding the divorce and taxes. Usually I will hear back from him, but this time... silence. No "fuck you," no "where's my [insert something he could have bothered to ask for here]," no "I have no idea what you're talking about." I don't care if he's a new uncle, if he broke his leg, if he's depressed, or if he won the lotto -- this is important, and I am NOT going to pay for his laziness anymore. I'm done with that crap.

"So Wynne," you ask, "why don't you just re-file the papers yourself and get it over with? Isn't it worth it to not have to think about him ever again?" Maybe, but that's not the point.

Everything I have ever asked Garret to do, and every responsibility Garret has ever had for others has been ignored or argued about. During the marriage I would jump through every little hoop he threw out to "ask the right way," and it almost always resulted in me giving up and doing it myself. The only things Garret ever did when I asked him to were "take out the garbage" and "come eat." I'm not doing this one for him. He's the one that put me through the ringer. He's the one that ruined everything. He's the one that decided to leave. This is one mess I refuse to clean up.

Plus, I don't have the money to re-file. I'm about to make a big decision soon whether or not to walk away from this house. I can't afford to sell it.

Have I mentioned I'm not going to clean up after him this time? I don't think I've hammered that point home enough.

Comments

[estrojenn.livejournal.com]

you should phone him and leave a message. and do it every day until he calls back. ultimately getting this divorce is going to make your life better. and he isn't likely to change his ways at this point. so unless you keep bugging him or file yourself it may never happen. it might be one of the ways he is trying to control you to (not replying, not showing up etc.)

[winifred.livejournal.com]

I do need to make a better effort to contact him. It's just tiring for me to do this, and I am still at a place where I would sooner punch him in the face than talk to him. Email is safer for both of us, and I'm not entirely sure why he didn't answer this time. It's likely he is waiting for me to send him something, but if he doesn't say what that is I will never know.

Yeah, that's petty. Being the grownup never really got me anywhere with him before. It will this time, but I'm so @#!! sick of it.

[estrojenn.livejournal.com]

i laughed so hard at the "sooner punch him in the face" comment. it is exhausting though...

[twilight2000.livejournal.com]

Two things - selling the house at a loss is still better than walking away, financially - so let me put you in contact with a real estate agent that I know and can chat with you before you just walk.

And - however much you may want him to clean up after himself, he clearly doesn't care - this is an issue only for you - so if you want out and to move on, It appears you need to be the one to do just that. Regardless of who *should* clean up, if you file, you get to go free -- and that's ultimately what you're looking for,

It might be worth it.

[winifred.livejournal.com]

Selling the house right now would put me $40k in the hole. I've been losing equity for the last six months, and my neighbors only were able to sell low because they'd been in that house for 25 years. It doesn't look good.

The money is what's keeping me from doing it. I don't have that kind of cash lying around. If I did, I could fix my car and pay my outrageous power bill. Filing 2009 taxes will be his wake-up call, I'm pretty sure of it.

[(Anonymous)]

If you don't refile it'll never get done. Can't you sell something he left behind to fund it?

[winifred.livejournal.com]

It would mean more to me if I could sell something he left behind unintentionally -- those are all things he didn't want to deal with, including a lot of his bachelor pad furniture. There is nothing of his here that would raise the $250-750 required to re-file. It's all junk that will be sold at my next garage sale, and that money is already spent to pay the credit card debt I put the original mediation fees on.