I am long overdue

[fatrockstar]

Let me tell you internet --

My days of being pushed around by people is coming to an end. I'm sick and tired of having my kind and forgiving nature taken advantage of. When I was a punk kid I would be nice to people for what they could do for me. Then I grew the fuck up.

I want people to be happy, it's a flaw of mine that I'm okay with since I don't dole out kindness or compassion at a loss. I do it because I want to. It's one of the few things I can do that doesn't make me feel like a jackass.

But GOD FUCKING DAMMIT I am fed up with being manipulated by people who haven't grown the fuck up and feel like anybody who has the audacity to walk the same earth as them owes them diddly shit. I don't owe anybody kindness. I'd sooner kick you in the head than look at you, that's how little I care about what you think you deserve. But I don't. I'm nice. When you shit on me and treat me like dirt, I'm nice. When you take my kindness and give nothing in return, I'm nice.

Sadly, it is now time to NOT be nice.

I asked my housemate four days ago (yes, four -- it was Sunday that I asked this) so very kindly, and with a smile on my face, to please empty the dishwasher for me. I felt it was only fair since I had been doing what are normally his chores all week. Today I asked again (nicely and without the slightest bit of irritation in my voice) and got attitude. "I might," he said. I wanted to scream at him but didn't. Why did I not do that? Why did I not screw up my face in anger and yell

YOU'D BETTER, BECAUSE IF YOU DON'T I'M GOING TO BREAK EVERY SINGLE FUCKING DISH IN THERE AND THEN PUT THE SHARDS IN YOUR BED FOR YOU TO SLEEP ON

Why didn't I do that? Why oh why? I'll tell you why -- it's because I'm nice.

I'm at the end of my rope. I'm also afraid I've caught the Seattle Passive-Aggressive Syndrome from this person. Go ahead, say it: "SPAS" -- it's funny. Before this year is out I will make the evening news. My mugshot will be me wide-eyed and grinning with crazy hair. I will look like the goddamn Joker. It will be because I went on a killing spree and hacked up three people who have pushed me beyond my patience. They press charges for that, you know.

So there you have it, internet. I am not going to be pushed around anymore. I will either blow up or become a SPAS victim.

And yes, I do know this is a public post. Why do you ask?

Comments

[edith-mf.livejournal.com]

Go disposable. Use paper plates. Lots of guys live like that--take a page from their book. You don't have to clean dishes, the odd pot and knife maybe, but paper plates and bowls microwave fine. There is even compostable plastic ware (spudware) we have it at work.

The dishes can be packed away in storage. the paper plates, bowls, cups and spudware and such might be allowed to go in your green bin, depending on the local greenwaste collector.

[winifred.livejournal.com]

I gave up yesterday on using clean dishes for a while and bought paper plates. Since I'm not bringing home many groceries these days, the things I do end up bringing home are finger foods. I've seen that compostable flatware and it's awesome! I wish I could find it locally. I should ask the Google office here and see where they get theirs.

I know it's petty to not do it myself "on principle," but I've been giving in and doing it for him almost every time since we moved in together, and I'm not going to bloody well take it anymore. I should just pack up what's in the dishwasher. Then slowly everything would just disappear from the kitchen as it got washed -- I could blame a secret vortex or something.

[edith-mf.livejournal.com]

You can say the Goodwill people came through looking for obvious donations and confiscated the lot of it.

[purpurerose.livejournal.com]

Don't end up a victim of SPAS! Tell his ass off.

[jbluemoon.livejournal.com]

go get em tiger!!!

Amen

[pulsdeslebens.livejournal.com]

I can relate because I'm the same fucking way. It annoys the crap out of me and what's worse is that it's almost a compulsion. I don't have an issue with my spouse; it's other people. The stupid people in the world who continue to breed and fill the world with more and more stupid, rude people.

The problem is that not expressing your irritation and anger leads to *a lot* of repressed anger and rage, and I'm convinced this is the reason why people go postal. Something just pushes that button one more fucking time, and then it's time to do a lot of unloading on people.